living now for a little bit abroad, I realized how to work the three Italian products abroad for excellence: pasta, pizza and coffee. Or rather, the three products Italian food, because the three Italian products are excellent for the Mafia, football corrupt and cunning of the typical Italian-who-think-smart-in-the-Italian-all-but- the-others-are-suckers.
pasta, pizza and coffee as we conceive them in Italy, abroad are quite different. Worse, of course. Pasta is one thing that all terms on the boxes and envelopes are associated with the product in pure Italian (spaghetti, "" penne "," ribbed pipe "," Butterflies, "" Lasagna ", which even then sanno pronunciarla la parola "lasagne", che cacchio ce lo scrivono a fare?), mentre se poi vai a leggere gli ingredienti o qualsiasi altra cosa, tutto il resto è in lingua straniera. La Marca Italiana di pasta in Olanda è Grand'Italia, una marca assolutamente ignota in Italia (e ci sarà un motivo). Non ho ancora avuto modo di scoprire come viene cucinata qui la pasta, ma sinceramente per una qualche ragione preferirei rimanere nell'ignoranza.
La pizza è quella cosa che secondo un qualsiasi non italiano è sufficiente che sia di forma approssimativamente tonda, con formaggio al posto della mozzarella, con ingredienti casuali sopra che più non c'entrano un cazzo l'uno con l'altro e meglio è, per essere chiamata "pizza". Wood stoves not even talking about it, at least not here in Holland. Let's leave that kind of entity is pizza in America, where it is normally eaten cold for breakfast the night before from surplus (and who does it in Italy is unquestionably a monster ).
Coffee is that dark thing that the more the better (as a friend of Dario Baldambembo). Outside Italy, it is common ground now, do not drink coffee, but a watery gruel flavored coffee. So much so in fact that only outside Italy feels the need to distinguish between coffee and espresso , since in Italy the coffee is expressed. The beauty is which even expressed abroad is a real espresso. It 'only a watery gruel flavored coffee, but a little' less watery coffee above. There is no way to make him understand that coffee is a beverage to be sipped in tall glass. It is not just a drink , fuck! As for pasta, even for coffee all the terms related to coffee are always written in Italian ("restricted", "long", "short", "latte"). As if they understood the difference. Here in Holland people are interfaced with the coffee in three distinct categories: those who want to drink it Italian at all costs (but then remain strangely puzzled when they discover that express itself is so little and so strong), and those who drink it only if there is at least half a pint in the glass, and finally those that Italians are a bit 'too fixated with their stupid coffee who the hell will be so special as they desperately want their coffee, stupid Italians maniacs. Proof that what I'm saying is all true is that anywhere outside the Italian borders to find a coffee bar that cost less than one euro is quite impossible. More expensive oil, and is definitively a ciofeche (as someone said ).
La pizza è quella cosa che secondo un qualsiasi non italiano è sufficiente che sia di forma approssimativamente tonda, con formaggio al posto della mozzarella, con ingredienti casuali sopra che più non c'entrano un cazzo l'uno con l'altro e meglio è, per essere chiamata "pizza". Wood stoves not even talking about it, at least not here in Holland. Let's leave that kind of entity is pizza in America, where it is normally eaten cold for breakfast the night before from surplus (and who does it in Italy is unquestionably a monster ).
Coffee is that dark thing that the more the better (as a friend of Dario Baldambembo). Outside Italy, it is common ground now, do not drink coffee, but a watery gruel flavored coffee. So much so in fact that only outside Italy feels the need to distinguish between coffee and espresso , since in Italy the coffee is expressed. The beauty is which even expressed abroad is a real espresso. It 'only a watery gruel flavored coffee, but a little' less watery coffee above. There is no way to make him understand that coffee is a beverage to be sipped in tall glass. It is not just a drink , fuck! As for pasta, even for coffee all the terms related to coffee are always written in Italian ("restricted", "long", "short", "latte"). As if they understood the difference. Here in Holland people are interfaced with the coffee in three distinct categories: those who want to drink it Italian at all costs (but then remain strangely puzzled when they discover that express itself is so little and so strong), and those who drink it only if there is at least half a pint in the glass, and finally those that Italians are a bit 'too fixated with their stupid coffee who the hell will be so special as they desperately want their coffee, stupid Italians maniacs. Proof that what I'm saying is all true is that anywhere outside the Italian borders to find a coffee bar that cost less than one euro is quite impossible. More expensive oil, and is definitively a ciofeche (as someone said ).
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